Lake Michigan, or, You people are freaking idiots

It seems likely that the Wood children share a death wish. What else would explain the decision to go to Lake Michigan and walk out to the lighthouse in yesterday’s gathering dusk? The walkway is covered with inches of ice. The ice slopes down to the gray-brown water. There is no way to climb out of the water. There is nothing for a person to hold onto to help you out of the water. The water is deep and damn cold. One slip, and you’re history. So, natch, a perfect outing on a dull Saturday afternoon. There’s a word for this…wait just a minute…almost got it…oh, yeah: IDIOCY. Or insanity, take your pick.

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We’re not quite as dumb as we look. We took it slowly, walking single file as far from the water as possible. We didn’t climb up on the lighthouse platform itself. We didn’t go swimming. We wore warm socks. Two of us even had gloves! Not sure how cold it was then, but it’s about negative 3 degrees in LaPorte right now.

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The graffiti was kind of a let-down. We’re 30 miles from Gary, and this is the best you’ve got? Come ON.

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Coffee and clove cigarettes were the order of the day. Check out these yahoo posers.

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Look at me! I’m an ice fairy!

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Nope, no family resemblance here. I wonder if we could sell our eyeballs on ebay or something. Surely someone in South America or India or somewhere is dying to get his or her hands on our baby blues.

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We passed a teenage couple on our way back to the car. They weren’t taking any precautions about the ice, and the girl fell on her butt right as they passed us, only a few feet from the edge. We rolled our eyes at each other and hoped they wouldn’t die, but when they climbed up to the lighthouse platform, my brother went back to give them a helpful little lecture on NOT BEING FREAKING IDIOTS. I guess they listened, because they got down and headed towards the beach.

It’s hard to lecture someone against doing practically the same thing you’re doing yourself, but we didn’t want to feel responsible for any teenager-cicles. We do have our limits. I mean, we may be dumb, but we’re not STUPID, for heaven’s sake.

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~ by themeansister on December 21, 2008.

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